Hey...Where'd the pirate go?

So, the experiment to see whether or not you really could get enough of the cute Taiwanese kids on my blog has clearly gone horribly, horribly wrong. Occasionally, I use the links off of my blog because I'm too lazy to remember the actual addresses, and even I'm sick of the pictures. That will happen. But anyway, I'm back to the world of blogging now, well somewhat. The following post is my newsletter from November/December, so some of you may have read it before, but hey, at least it's not captain pirate anymore.

親愛的弟兄姐妹們,
Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

Greetings in this New Year, 2006! We’ve all made it, amazingly enough. What may be even more amazing is you actually making it all the way through this newsletter since it’s a little longer. I’ve been using Christmas as a poor excuse for not communicating for the last two months; consequentially, there is much to tell. I usually try not to make these things too lengthy in an attempt to respect the fact that everyone has things to attend to in their busy lives, but I’ve decided to allow myself something of an exception in this case. You’re reading other lengthy epistles updating you on everyone else’s lives, why not your favorite missionary as well? ‘Tis the season, right?

This holiday season has been cause for much reflection on my part. That will happen when something so familiar is taken completely out of any context where one has previously known it. Replace pine trees with palm trees. Replace snow with the kind of weather that I typically expect out of mid to late October. Replace the typical Christmas program with a Christmas talent show. Replace “Silent Night” with “平安夜,” Ping An Ye. This year, I even celebrated Christmas with a different family, the family that God has given me in Taiwan. And that’s only the beginning…

The holidays have also been different this year because it’s the first time I’ve ever been in charge of anything. Apparently, the foreign teacher in the kindergarten gets to head up the kindergarten Christmas extravaganza. Every new teacher’s dream come true. *cough* While it’s true that I have participated in plenty of Christmas activities before, never before have I taken on the role of commander. Or, more accurately, had that role thrust upon me. I first became aware of this responsibility sometime in September when DeeDee (the wife of our coordinator, Matt Wasmund, who also, incidentally, taught kindergarten last year) pulled me aside and gently explained that I would “pretty much be the go-to-girl for the Christmas program.” I had no idea what that meant at the time, but I did know that I didn’t like the sound of it. I decided to handle the problem Taiwanese style; that is, put it on the back of the stove until you smell something burning. Periodic progress checks are in order though, so occasionally I would find myself having conversations that went something like the following (it’s translated for your convenience):

“Say, how’s the Christmas program coming? Do you need any help?” (Translation: “Hey, have you checked on Christmas lately? It’s not burning is it?”)
“Yeah, it’s coming. I’m almost done writing the lines and I’ve just about got the songs are picked out.” (Translation: “I stirred it a couple of minutes ago. It should be fine for a while.”)
“Great! Well, let me know if there’s anything I can do, if I can help.” (Translation: “Keep an eye on it. If you’re not careful it’ll boil over in a couple of weeks. Good luck!”)
To myself: Phewww, got through another one of those conversations. And they still think I’ve got things under control! Heh heh. You were right, Barnum. Hmmm. (frowning at pot) What’s in this pot anyway? What am I even cooking up here? Shoot. Who’s really the sucker in this deal…?

Meanwhile, November demanded some attention. There were two major events in November on top of the usual routine to keep us all occupied. The first was Thanksgiving and all the activities therein, and the second was the Asia Ablaze! Summit in Hong Kong over Thanksgiving weekend. First things first: the kindergarten “feast.” Maybe “feast” isn’t the best word I could use to describe it since they really didn’t eat all that much, but I guess when you’re five years old it doesn’t really take much food to make a feast, especially when it’s weird foreign stuff. By the end of the day, I had seen all three hundred plus kindergarteners (about 200 of which are my students) come through my room. The routine, performed in twenty minute increments, was basically the same for each class. Come to my room; sing “Hello, Mr. Turkey, how are you?” (To the tune of “If You’re Happy and You Know It”); say a Thanksgiving prayer led by yours truly; eat; and, finally, get shooed out the door since the next class was already waiting outside, their little mouths watering in anticipation. The “turkey” we ate was actually chicken since real turkey is somewhat difficult to obtain and expensive besides, but the kids didn’t seem to mind. I found out that some of my kindergarteners are vegetarians (vegetarian kindergarteners—now I’ve seen everything), which either means they’re the most socially conscious children I’ve ever encountered or that they’re Buddhist. I’ve also been told that some Taiwanese kids don’t really like meat that much. *shrug* In any case, everyone repeated after me as we said a Thanksgiving prayer to Jesus, thanking him for our food and many blessings. Also on the menu besides the chick—I mean “turkey,” were sweet potatoes, corn, pumpkin seeds, and apple cider to drink. The kids liked the food, I liked the break in the routine, and I think a good time was had by all.









November’s second big activity, following immediately on the heels of the Thanksgiving feast was the Asia Ablaze! Summit in Hong Kong. Missionaries and nationals alike from all over Asia came together in Hong Kong to talk about Ablaze! and, like the good Lutherans we are, discuss “what does this [Ablaze!] mean?” For me personally, Ablaze! basically boils down to follow Christ. If you have the heart of Christ and follow where he leads, I have a feeling that whatever Ablaze! is will follow. God is the one who is ablaze here. He’s the source. So, naturally, if you’re near the source, you’re going to catch fire yourself, and then the people around you will catch too, and on and on. Then, the specifics of how a heart on fire for the Lord manifests itself, in other words, how it applies practically to one’s ministry, can be left to the particular time and place where one is serving. The other half of Ablaze!, of course, is the resolution to reach 100 million people with the Gospel by 2017, the 500th anniversary of the Reformation. They kept saying that it was an ambitious goal. Personally, I’m with the lady who stood up and pointed out how small a percentage of the population of Asia 100 million people is. She was thinking of reaching people in the billions. Now that’s what I’m talking about! 100 million people is less than ten percent of the population of China alone! And Asia includes India, China, Japan, Indonesia…Come on people! We work for God! Think BIG!

OK, I’m a little excited about missions here. Probably a good thing since that’s what I’m doing. Anyway, back to the newsletter.


So, besides attending the sessions and talks by the keynote speakers, Team Taiwan was also asked to help lead worship at different times throughout the summit. It ended up being a lot of work, especially for Molly Hinz, who was basically the contact person/organizer on top of being our star keyboardist. We all worked hard though, and by the power of the Holy Spirit, I think it went rather well. At least that’s what all the people that came up to me said. Most of my part was playing guitar, but I was on vocals for a couple of songs, and the recorder even snuck its way into one of the hymns. I’m never quite sure how to take compliments after I’ve helped lead worship, because I basically see myself simply as a participant. Plus a microphone/instrument. On the other hand, it’s nice to have people acknowledge the time you’ve put into preparation and the gifts God has given you. Ah well. Soli Deo Gloria.


Here I am after a few misadventures in Hong Kong. We had some free time on Friday night, and I chose to go with the group that was braving the longest escalator in the world. After climbing about four stories of it, we decided to heed the signs that said it was closed and went back down. We were then going to walk along the harbor, but the harbor walk waa closed too. At that point, we decided to cut our losses, and go back to the hotel. After comforting ourselves with icecream, of course.

Asia Ablaze!, or ABLASIA as we like to call it here in Taiwan, was a time of refreshment, encouragement, excitement, reunion with old friends, and it gave me a lot to think about. I didn’t have a lot of time for pondering though, because as soon as our flight from Hong Kong touched down in Taiwan, the smell of Christmas was in the air—and it was burning. Shoot! I rushed to check on it. Turns out, it was only at a vigorous boil and a few drops had spilled over onto the stove. Still, the scent of charred Christmas lingering faintly in the air was enough to spur me into really taking the task seriously. Script written? Check. Songs picked out? Check. Do the children know any of this? Ahhh… Do any of their teachers besides me know any of this? Ahhh…

Thus began the madness. It quickly became apparent that “go-to-girl” was something of an understatement. I was essentially the mastermind, musician, artist, and general teacher. Cringe. As a pastor’s child, I have watched numerous people languish under the yoke of Christmas programs all my life, and I was less than excited to find myself similarly burdened. The one bright shining gleam of hope, the secret ingredient if you will, in all this nasty business is that once the homeroom teachers knew what to do, they absolutely drilled the kids on it. I discovered that my computer has a program for recording WAV music files (who knew?), so I recorded all the songs and then burned a CD for each class with their songs on it. That turned out to be a really good move since I noticed that there was a dramatic improvement in singing immediately following the introduction of the CDs into the classroom. Thereafter, I often heard my own voice echoing eerily down the halls of the kindergarten as the teachers blasted the songs from their stereos. It was definitely creepy, but I was willing to endure a few involuntary shudders on my part for the sake of the results, which were quite spectacular. Within a matter of days, the kids were solid on their songs. Now, all that remained was putting the thing together in Luther Hall.

I’ve decided that 300 kindergarteners, jabbering away like monkeys, and fifteen or so teachers all looking to you to tell them what to do is a little intimidating. I’ve also found that if you pretend you’re in control and that you know what you’re doing, people often mistake this for actually being in control and knowing what you’re doing. Or maybe they’re just willing to pretend too. In any event, I was far from being as alone as I’m probably making this sound. I was inexpressibly thankful for my Taiwanese colleague, Pearl, took on a lot of the logistical stuff as far as getting everyone seated and working out a few of the other inevitable kinks. I honestly don’t think I would have been able to face it all if she hadn’t been there. I was also very thankful for all my team members who, though they had their own Christmas pots to watch, were there to help take care of mine. They were drilling the kids in their classes and were there at practices as much as their own busy schedules allowed. These people made me look very good. As good teammates will.





During all this, I was not the most pleasant person to hang around. I tried to keep from verbalizing all the internal grousing, but enough got through the censor to annoy those in the general vicinity. Scrooge would have been proud. I spent a lot of time contemplating the reasons why we all go to so much trouble for Christmas. Outside of my missionary colleagues, most of the people I work with are not Christian. What does this mean to them? Is this just a performance? Even though the only message this program proclaimed was the Gospel (one of the more pleasant side effects of writing the Christmas program is that the message is whatever you make it, so I had the novel idea to make it about Jesus), was anything getting through?

Christmas wasn’t just about being unusually busy either. It consumed our thoughts and our time, both in and out of school. If there was anything to be dealt with, friends to see, or more leisurely activities to take part in (like a rousing game of Ultimate Frisbee, for example), our collective pat answer became “Sure! I’d love to—after Christmas.” Want to go see a movie? Sure—after Christmas. Want to come over to our house for a cooking lesson? Love to!—after Christmas. Would you like to get to know a Taiwanese family and get to practice your Chinese a little bit? Absolutely—after Christmas. Are you ever going to write a newsletter or update your blog? I’ll get around to it—after Christmas.

After Christmas. What would it be like? Why, we would have our lives back! The restoration of our freedom! The promise of “after Christmas” was something we all looked forward to with much longing and anticipation. Life would be better after Christmas.

Well, the kindergarten Christmas extravaganza went off without too many hitches. The CELA Christmas program went well. The middle school teachers performed their own skit. The students decorated some of the trees around campus with Bible story themes. We caroled, we made and ate Christmas cookies, we did another skit for the Christmas Eve talent show at church and the same skit again on Christmas morning. We stuffed ourselves like Christmas geese at the “Love Feast” put on by the church we all attend (everyone invites their friends and we all eat Christmas day lunch together out doors. Go tropical climate! Don’t worry; we eat under tents in case it rains. There were two hundred plus people who came to eat and share the love. It’s quite the affair—ahem, I mean event.)

And then…it was after Christmas. It’s what we had been waiting for all along, at least, we thought so. All the programs over, all the gifts exchanged, all the songs sung, all the feasts consumed. And, when all else was finally stripped away, all that was left was Jesus. Jesus. And it was then that I realized that I had been waiting not for “after Christmas,” such as it is, but rather for Christ himself. I was looking so hard for him. Jesus, where are you in the hype? In the busyness?
Not surprisingly, he was right where the angel said he would be. He is here! He is with us! In the manger, on the cross, out of the grave, into our hearts. He is here! After Christmas, he gave us our lives back. After Christmas, he brought us freedom. How they longed for him then! How we still long for him now! And it’s true in so many ways: Life is better after Christmas.

Most of Christmas still seems pretty silly to me. There’s a lot of nonsense that comes along with it all. Then again, I suppose Christmas never really made sense in the first place. A virgin with child? A king in a manger? Almighty God in man? Nope, no sense in that. Does this mean I’ll cut Christmas some slack next year? Mmm, I’m pretty sure that would take a Christmas miracle. God is all-powerful though, so anything could happen. You’ll have to check with me then. Until that time, I’ll revel in the post Christmas joy and wonder of Jesus.

May His love go with you through this New Year.

Peace and Joy.